April 11, 2011

I like to freak myself out




I have problems. Literally. It's because of these problems that I believe I have developed a new problem... Hypochondriasis. In simple terms? IM NUTS. No, just kidding (kinda). It's not that severe..yet.  With all of the health problems I have been enduring over the last 2 years how could I NOT be paranoid? I have the tendency to "google" my symptoms and if I have a diagnostic answer..I will search that topic endlessly. I have been doing this since Wednesday, when it was confirmed I have Endometriosis. I am happy, in a weird way, that I actually have something wrong with me, and its proven! The past 2 years have been so horrible, not knowing what is wrong with my body. Now that I have some sort of an answer I am fixated on it; how to make it better, what causes it, what symptoms I have, etc. etc. I wont know much about my Endo until my follow up appointment (tomorrow) so you would think I would wait to talk to my doctor before sketching myself out? Nope. Here I am reading through hundreds of articles and starting to worry. I know it's silly but not only do I have Endo, I suffer from Anxiety and Depression (helpful combo! ;] ) so I have a hard time relaxing. I am going to force myself, right now, to close down ALL health related webpages I have open and I am going to do something relaxing... Read, tweet, and eat :) 
Tomorrow night I will post the outcome of my follow up but until then, I am clearing my mind of negativity and worry! This is all part of my goal to be a new, happier, healthier, ME :)


Until next time,
Melissa

2 comments:

  1. Hey, just read ur blog + understand exactly what u mean. The confusion of not knowing whats causing ur pain, thinking ur going mad. Then being diagnosed and feeling happy in one way but sad at the same time. I was diagnosed only in feb. Oh btw, im a constant googler too! Im here if u ever want a chat x

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  2. It's great you know exactly how I feel, I have no one in my "real life" that has experienced anything like this so its hard for people to understand. I finally got some answers today and you're right, it's happy and sad at the same time.
    Im trying to stay positive! :)

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